Misery

Misery

perhaps not
i think the first time
in the beginning
it seemed an adventure
i felt bold and strong -
up to the challenge

bring it on
my sufficient-self declared
but time and again
life poured forth her misery
till sweat dripped
crimson from my brow

battered and bruised
i ventured to the pit
the exquisite feel of agony
entwined her tentacles
around my naked throat
garroting my thoughts
offering no mercy

deep within i resisted
searching for relief
extending my weary limb
toward the hand that ever
waits
for our feeble cry
God, Jehovah, Elohim, Adonai

spent, exhausted
but yet not trusting
i clung tentatively to the
steady hand of GOD
harassed on all sides
refusing to be soothed by the
great comforter

like a child
panicked….
unable to calm
even
when mother is present


though i knew the truth
it evaded my grasp
because i
the errant sinner
still sufficient in self
trusted no one
even less my loving savior